Monday, December 3, 2012


Holiday Etiquette For The Dog
Special Attention - Should be Read Out Loud to Yer Pet, Eh
followed with a treat!

1. Be especially patient with your humans during this time. They may appear to be more stressed-out than usual and they will appreciate long comforting dog leans.
2. They may come home with large bags of things they call gifts. Do not assume that all the gifts are yours.
 3. Be tolerant if your humans put decorations on you. They seem to get some special kind of pleasure out of seeing how you look with Holiday sweaters, etc.

4. They may bring a large tree into the house and set it up in a prominent place and cover it with lights and decorations. Bizarre as this may seem to you, it is an important ritual for your humans, so there are some things you need to know:
* Don't pee on the tree
* Don't drink water in the container that holds the tree.
* Mind your tail when you are near the tree.
* If there are packages under the tree, even ones that smell interesting or that have your name on them, don't rip them open.
* Don't chew on the cord that runs from the funny-looking hole in the wall to the tree.
5. Your humans may occasionally invite lots of strangers to come visit during this season. These parties can be lots of fun, but they also call for some discretion on your part:
* Not all strangers appreciate kisses and leans.
* Don't eat off the buffet table.
* Beg for goodies subtly.
* Be pleasant, even if unknowing strangers sit on your sofa.
* Don't drink out of glasses that are left within your reach.
6. Likewise, your humans may take you visiting. Here your manners will also be important:
* Observe all the rules in #4 for trees that may be in other people's houses.
* Respect the territory of other animals that may live in the house.
* Turn on your charm - BIG TIME.
7. Last and most important - A big man with a white beard and a very loud laugh may emerge from your fireplace in the middle of the night. DON'T BITE HIM !!
 Delightfully Yours, Jacque
Woof, Woof n All That, Eh!


DJan said...

Oh, what smiles are coming your way, especially after that last picture with the grin that made me laugh out loud! :-)

Red said...

You can really lay it on thick for these poor little critters! How are they ever going to have fun? Christmas is a time to "not stress the small stuff."
I'll bet you have a set of rules for kids too! Maybe adults? Maybe Santa?
Love your sense of humor. I given you ideas for a few more posts!

Karen Jones Gowen said...

This one really has me smiling. It's been awhile since we had our 2 dogs. They both lived long and happy lives. Our large male Doberman, who thinks it is HIS house, never liked the intrusion of the big ol' tree with its strange lights and smells. We had to watch him constantly to keep him from lifting his leg and showing that tree who was top dog.

Red Nomad OZ said...

Hahaha! That's hilarious!! I'll be sure to look out for dogs who have/haven't read these instructions - it should be easy to spot!!!

Wsprsweetly Of Cottages said...

This is just the cutest post! I had to read it outloud to PH and he got a kick out of it too. It's all sooo true. I loved it.

Jack looks so sharp in his outfits..I can't get anything on Mele and even her collar is a challenge. Her fur is just too thick. Still trying to get a bow on her!

Dar said...

Instructions for your pet...ingenious. I love how intently your loving pal is listening and then smiles. I wonder what he's thinking?

I'm visiting from Gail's At the Farm and glad I stopped.

diane b said...

I hope all canines read this post. Cute puppy.

Red Nomad OZ said...

Hi again! Don't know if you got my email about our 'loo' interview?? It's live! Or did you see it & didn't like it ...